Unfortunately my Mother's Day weekend didn't get off to the greatest start. Something I ate didn't agree with my stomach and it became clear at approximately 4 o'clock in the morning when I awoke with terrible stomach cramps. Still, about six hours later I tried to trek on to work to take advantage of infrequently offered overtime. But the closer I got to my job, although mildly improved, my crampy stomach told me I wouldn't be able to concentrate on much else. So, regrettfully I turned around to go back home. Then I had a epiphany! As far as anyone knew, I was gonna be at work for the next four hours. So I figured this was the best opportunity for a little "me" time.
While quietly suffering, I preceded to treat myself to a much needed and well deserved pedicure, followed by my favorite meal of the day--breakfast(albeit I was unable to enjoy it). Had it not been Mother's Day, I would've taken my behind home, but something just didn't seem right about not having some time to myself to do things for myself that I deserve and enjoy.
I really appreciate the opportunity that Mother's Day affords me. Although I know plenty of moms who treat themselves to pedicures, manicures, facials, etc on a regular basis, I have not been apart of that circle in a few years now. Since returning to single mom status a couple of years ago, I was forced to readjust my financial priorities to, not only accomplish some short-term goals, but also to continue the pattern of saving that I managed to establish being married. With that came less trips to the hair salon, only seasonal pedicures, no manicures, and no major wardrobe upgrades for myself. I committed myself to spending regularly for the children's needs and only as needed or for special occassions for myself.
As mothers, we know that our children always need one thing or another. Whether its lunch money, field trip money, money for hanging out w/friends, socks, undies, and the list goes on and on. Well Mother's Day (and my birthday) are the only times of the year when I can, with a clear conscience, declare that the only spending that I'll be doing will be on ME.
So, until the children are completely self-sufficient (whenever that is), whether rain, sleet, snow, or stomach ache, I will continue to set aside Mother's Day to treat myself to a little luxury.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Friday, May 8, 2009
A New Day Has Begun
Two important things occured in the special election on May 5, 2009. Of the 15% of registered voters, it was clear that the Detroiters who really care about this city don't want anymore of the same. We just got rid of one arrogant mayor, who put himself above the interest of the city--we didn't need another one with Ken Cockrel Jr. And while I question what Mayor-elect Dave Bing can accomplish in the short seven month stint of his term, his election to office still signifies the change Detroiters need and want.
The second important occurence in the special elections is the decision to revise the city charter. Who will revise is it, I'm not sure. But the fact that it's going to be revised is a great start. One of the first revisions should be an amendment to this entire special election process. If there is 18 months or less for the vacating mayoral position, then the interim mayor should serve the rest of the term. That makes a lot more sense than spending all of the money that has been spent so someone can be in office for a little over 6 months, only to have to run again for a full term.
While the process has been crazy, it's well worth it for a new leader of the city to have emerged. Having fresh blood take the reins of the city gives Detroiters hope that we will finally move in the direction that the well-intentioned, but entirely too arrogant and immature, former Mayor of Detroit, Kwame Kilpatrick envisioned for our city.
Now we can look forward to the major election in November and get a clean slate on City Counsel.
The second important occurence in the special elections is the decision to revise the city charter. Who will revise is it, I'm not sure. But the fact that it's going to be revised is a great start. One of the first revisions should be an amendment to this entire special election process. If there is 18 months or less for the vacating mayoral position, then the interim mayor should serve the rest of the term. That makes a lot more sense than spending all of the money that has been spent so someone can be in office for a little over 6 months, only to have to run again for a full term.
While the process has been crazy, it's well worth it for a new leader of the city to have emerged. Having fresh blood take the reins of the city gives Detroiters hope that we will finally move in the direction that the well-intentioned, but entirely too arrogant and immature, former Mayor of Detroit, Kwame Kilpatrick envisioned for our city.
Now we can look forward to the major election in November and get a clean slate on City Counsel.
Friday, May 1, 2009
Show some Detroit Love Please
I'll be the first to admit that it's hard to love Detroit right about now. Others may say it's ALWAYS hard. Amidst the auto crisis, high crime rate, high property taxes and insurance, failing public school system, and such highly publicized corruption in our local government, this is probably about the worst time to love Detroit.
Nevertheless, whether you are stuck in this city because of the current economy or have chosen to remain in the city for reasons only you, personally, may understand, we {Detroiters} still have a responsibility to uplift our community.
I, like many people, know people who live all over. In respects to Michigan, I know just as many people who on the outskirts of the city as I do people who live in the city od Detroit. But you know what, I never hear the people who live outside of the city, a.k.a the burbs, talking down about their resident. And believe me, there could be something negative said, albeit not as much as Detroit, of anyplace.
But what's worse about Detroit is that as many people who don't live in the city who trash it (literally), there are just as many, if not more, who do live here that trash it as well. That's what breaks my heart.
Now check out this piece of news: A city is only as good as the people who inhabit it. So for those of you who are adding to the mayhem and destruction, GET IT TOGETHER!
My challenge to all others is, for as long as you are a resident of Detroit, show your city some love, some pride. Maybe if we do, others will follow suit.
Below are some simple ways you can do this:
1.) Don't throw trash out the window of your cars.
2.) If not totally detestable, pick up the trash in your neighborhood or any area you happen to walking in if there's a trash can near by.
3.) Next time you have out of town guests, try showcasing some of Detroit's hot spots (i.e. Starters Lounge (the original), the Riverwalk, the Ren Cen, Detroit Insitute of Art, etc.)
4.)If you're speaking of something negative going in the city, follow it up with a possible solution.
5.)Vote in every election and avoid choosing people solely based on name recognition. Find out what candidates plan to do and see if they've done it before in another capacity. Let's the stop putting our city in just anybody's hands.
Nevertheless, whether you are stuck in this city because of the current economy or have chosen to remain in the city for reasons only you, personally, may understand, we {Detroiters} still have a responsibility to uplift our community.
I, like many people, know people who live all over. In respects to Michigan, I know just as many people who on the outskirts of the city as I do people who live in the city od Detroit. But you know what, I never hear the people who live outside of the city, a.k.a the burbs, talking down about their resident. And believe me, there could be something negative said, albeit not as much as Detroit, of anyplace.
But what's worse about Detroit is that as many people who don't live in the city who trash it (literally), there are just as many, if not more, who do live here that trash it as well. That's what breaks my heart.
Now check out this piece of news: A city is only as good as the people who inhabit it. So for those of you who are adding to the mayhem and destruction, GET IT TOGETHER!
My challenge to all others is, for as long as you are a resident of Detroit, show your city some love, some pride. Maybe if we do, others will follow suit.
Below are some simple ways you can do this:
1.) Don't throw trash out the window of your cars.
2.) If not totally detestable, pick up the trash in your neighborhood or any area you happen to walking in if there's a trash can near by.
3.) Next time you have out of town guests, try showcasing some of Detroit's hot spots (i.e. Starters Lounge (the original), the Riverwalk, the Ren Cen, Detroit Insitute of Art, etc.)
4.)If you're speaking of something negative going in the city, follow it up with a possible solution.
5.)Vote in every election and avoid choosing people solely based on name recognition. Find out what candidates plan to do and see if they've done it before in another capacity. Let's the stop putting our city in just anybody's hands.
CWA & AT&T--The Fight Continues
The labor contract for Communication Workers of America (CWA) AT&T Midwest employees expired on April 4, 2009. Against the assumptions of non-management and management employees alike, the leaders of CWA did not call for a labor strike. With the economy being as it is, although a labor strike was voted for by the majority of union members, no one was complaining. Striking is not something we want to do, but we are prepared to do WHATEVER it takes to get a FAIR labor contract from telecommunication frontrunner, AT&T.
AT&T is insulting the intelligence of CWA leaders and the hardworking employees, who are the backbone, using the crisis of the BIG 3 Automakers in Michigan as a reason to not only shift massive healtcare costs from themselves, who reaped over 12 billion in profits in 2008, to their already struggling middle-class employees, but also reduce pensions, stagnate wage increases, eliminate job security measures.
Let me make it clear first, that workers of CWA are not looking for major increases in anything. What we want, which is the desire of any working person with or without family obligations, is to be able to continue to maintain our current standards of living. And believe me when I say, that that standard of living is nowhere near the luxurious standard of living afforded to the top executives of AT&T. We want to be able to afford modest homes, modest transportation, supply our homes with food, take care of our children, and have something to look forward to for retirement. That's not too much to ask for from a corporate giant like AT&T, an leader in an industry that is and continues to forecast increased profits.
Next on the agenda to make clear is the all-to-important fact that AT&T is NOT, nor are they anywhere near the predicament of the Big 3 automobile companies. This week Chrysler announced it would be filing for bankruptcy. Both Chrysler and General Motors have needed monies from the government to stay afloat. Ford Motor Company is the only one of the three who decided to manage without the government assistance. However, these dyer states of the automobile companies did not appear overnight. In fact, it's been several years in the making. And guess, what? Their troubles are not the fault of the union. It's the responsibility of the companies management team to maintain the profitablity of the company. And it's the union's responsibility to maintain the rights of its members. Together the groups' goal is to creat a mutually beneficial relationship where the advantage of one is not at the detrimental disadvantage of the other.
Through the years of their negotiating relationship, AT&T and CWA have always been successful with accomplishing the goal of mutual benefits for the labor contract. It's unacceptable of AT&T to be using the tragic situation of the auto industry for it's own selfishness. Rather than leading their industry in the fight with the government for universal healthcare for ALL citizens in this country, AT&T would rather jump on the bandwagon of extinguishing the middle-class.
Well, the members of CWA aren't taking that without a FIGHT! If you support this cause, please sign the petition at the following website: www.standupforworkers.com.
@ 2009 LA Jefferson
AT&T is insulting the intelligence of CWA leaders and the hardworking employees, who are the backbone, using the crisis of the BIG 3 Automakers in Michigan as a reason to not only shift massive healtcare costs from themselves, who reaped over 12 billion in profits in 2008, to their already struggling middle-class employees, but also reduce pensions, stagnate wage increases, eliminate job security measures.
Let me make it clear first, that workers of CWA are not looking for major increases in anything. What we want, which is the desire of any working person with or without family obligations, is to be able to continue to maintain our current standards of living. And believe me when I say, that that standard of living is nowhere near the luxurious standard of living afforded to the top executives of AT&T. We want to be able to afford modest homes, modest transportation, supply our homes with food, take care of our children, and have something to look forward to for retirement. That's not too much to ask for from a corporate giant like AT&T, an leader in an industry that is and continues to forecast increased profits.
Next on the agenda to make clear is the all-to-important fact that AT&T is NOT, nor are they anywhere near the predicament of the Big 3 automobile companies. This week Chrysler announced it would be filing for bankruptcy. Both Chrysler and General Motors have needed monies from the government to stay afloat. Ford Motor Company is the only one of the three who decided to manage without the government assistance. However, these dyer states of the automobile companies did not appear overnight. In fact, it's been several years in the making. And guess, what? Their troubles are not the fault of the union. It's the responsibility of the companies management team to maintain the profitablity of the company. And it's the union's responsibility to maintain the rights of its members. Together the groups' goal is to creat a mutually beneficial relationship where the advantage of one is not at the detrimental disadvantage of the other.
Through the years of their negotiating relationship, AT&T and CWA have always been successful with accomplishing the goal of mutual benefits for the labor contract. It's unacceptable of AT&T to be using the tragic situation of the auto industry for it's own selfishness. Rather than leading their industry in the fight with the government for universal healthcare for ALL citizens in this country, AT&T would rather jump on the bandwagon of extinguishing the middle-class.
Well, the members of CWA aren't taking that without a FIGHT! If you support this cause, please sign the petition at the following website: www.standupforworkers.com.
@ 2009 LA Jefferson
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Super Mom Moment
Every so often throughout the year I experience "super mom" moments. Last week, Thursday, was my son's 5th birthday. It was the same day of my 14year old daughter's Annual Sports Award Banquet at her middle school. This was the first year that the ceremony was taking place in the evening, which would've been most convenient had I not wanted to take my son and nephew to one of kids' favorite places, Chuck-E-Cheese. Since attending the banquet was mandatory, as was celebrating my baby's b-day on his day (Saturday was already filled up), some improvising would be called for.
Now, one would think I would've have everything all figured out a few weeks ago. However, I'm severly striken with procrastinitis, as like to call it, and have been for most of my life. So while I knew I was going to buy my son a new bike for his birthday, I was taking him out the evening before his birthday to get him sized for one. After we did at Toys R Us, I dropped him off at home with his sister while I made a trip to my local dollar store for his b-day balloons, which, of course, would remain in the car until he was asleep for the night. That wraps up the day before the b-day.
The day of, baby boy is happy to awake to his colorful assortment of balloons! Doesn't stop him from aksing where his presents and cake are??? Well, at 5, he hasn't drawn the conclusion that mom doesn't make cakes, she buys them. Grandma is the cake maker. However, mom was surprising him with cupcakes for his class after their naptime. I mistakenly figured he'd be distracted with getting ready for school to think about a cake. Anyway, regarding presents, the Batman car I bought for him on our trip to Toys R Us, he didn't consider to be among his b-day presents. He expected something the day of. Kids--gotta love 'em. But he had no idea that his brand new bike would be awaiting him when he got of school.
So I take him to school and hurry to work for a half day. I left work at 1PM, leaving myself exactly 1hr to get to Toys R Us to pick up the bike, get to the bakery for the cupcakes (yes, I should have bought them the day before, but remember, procrastinitis). Thank God, I managed to get everything done and arrived at the school promply at 2PM, surprising the birthday boy. It was lots of fun, although the b-day boy didn't want one of his own cupcakes.
We get home, he's blown away by his new bike. I have to run down the street alongside him as he rides because the bike is a little bigger than the one he learned how to ride without training wheels last summer. But he was doing great. Then once his sister came home froms school, there wasn't much time for anything else besides getting ready for her banquet. The two hour banquet, which consisted of a few song selections by the school choir, a keynote speaker, decent meal, and award presentation, was long and lovely, but she was glad, as most kids are (even teenagers) to have their mom is present at such special moments, of course taking pictures :)to capture the moment.
It was nearly 11PM when I was finally able to relax. Literally, I had been running around from the time I woke up that morning until we finally got home that night. It was a whirlwind of a day! But as tired as I was, I didn't regret a moment of it. With all the fussing and disciplining children that moms (and dads) have to do, moments when you know you're making them happy are so worth all the hard work. That makes it all worthwhile.
Now, one would think I would've have everything all figured out a few weeks ago. However, I'm severly striken with procrastinitis, as like to call it, and have been for most of my life. So while I knew I was going to buy my son a new bike for his birthday, I was taking him out the evening before his birthday to get him sized for one. After we did at Toys R Us, I dropped him off at home with his sister while I made a trip to my local dollar store for his b-day balloons, which, of course, would remain in the car until he was asleep for the night. That wraps up the day before the b-day.
The day of, baby boy is happy to awake to his colorful assortment of balloons! Doesn't stop him from aksing where his presents and cake are??? Well, at 5, he hasn't drawn the conclusion that mom doesn't make cakes, she buys them. Grandma is the cake maker. However, mom was surprising him with cupcakes for his class after their naptime. I mistakenly figured he'd be distracted with getting ready for school to think about a cake. Anyway, regarding presents, the Batman car I bought for him on our trip to Toys R Us, he didn't consider to be among his b-day presents. He expected something the day of. Kids--gotta love 'em. But he had no idea that his brand new bike would be awaiting him when he got of school.
So I take him to school and hurry to work for a half day. I left work at 1PM, leaving myself exactly 1hr to get to Toys R Us to pick up the bike, get to the bakery for the cupcakes (yes, I should have bought them the day before, but remember, procrastinitis). Thank God, I managed to get everything done and arrived at the school promply at 2PM, surprising the birthday boy. It was lots of fun, although the b-day boy didn't want one of his own cupcakes.
We get home, he's blown away by his new bike. I have to run down the street alongside him as he rides because the bike is a little bigger than the one he learned how to ride without training wheels last summer. But he was doing great. Then once his sister came home froms school, there wasn't much time for anything else besides getting ready for her banquet. The two hour banquet, which consisted of a few song selections by the school choir, a keynote speaker, decent meal, and award presentation, was long and lovely, but she was glad, as most kids are (even teenagers) to have their mom is present at such special moments, of course taking pictures :)to capture the moment.
It was nearly 11PM when I was finally able to relax. Literally, I had been running around from the time I woke up that morning until we finally got home that night. It was a whirlwind of a day! But as tired as I was, I didn't regret a moment of it. With all the fussing and disciplining children that moms (and dads) have to do, moments when you know you're making them happy are so worth all the hard work. That makes it all worthwhile.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
STAND for Something or Fall for ANYTHING
Even though I’ve been a union member 10 yrs now, and have gone through approximately 3 contract negotiations, I’ve never experienced anything like what I’m experiencing now. Communication Workers of America (CWA) is in the fight for its life with corporate giant AT&T. After the major concessions that the United Auto Workers (UAW) labor union had to make over the past couple of years, AT&T is more than determined to force CWA to make similar concessions, notwithstanding the fact that the telecommunications industry is nowhere near the ruined state of the automotive industry. In fact, like the medical industry, the telecommunications industry, with AT&T being at the top of the helm, still continues to reap huge profits. But still, they’re trying to force the union to make concessions in every vital area of interest to its workers: healthcare, wages, job protection, guaranteed time off, and retirement benefits.
One would think, in this case, that the members with the vested interest in these issues would do whatever their union leaders asked of them. Well, they don’t. From what I’ve been witnessing, too many of the members want to reap the benefits that the union provides, but aren’t the least bit interested in making even small sacrifices for the cause. Instead, they sit around sprouting off about how the union does nothing for them. About how the union is so weak. About how the union is busy lining their own pockets, not really fighting for the benefits those they represent.
The union, however, is only as strong as its members. I concede that labor unions are nowhere near the powerhouses they were back in the old days. But now I see why. It’s the weakness of the membership. The people don’t possess the passion for workers’ rights like they did back in the day. The people have taken for granted all of the benefits (40hr workweek, vacation days, personal days, sick days, 15 minute breaks, etc) that labor unions brought to the American workplace. Just like civil rights, the people have forgotten that the people of yesteryear fought and died for those very rights.
During a union steward training class I attended a couple of weeks, I was humbled beyond measure at the sight of a man beaten to death for supporting organized labor. Today, I, along with thousands of others, are able to be apart of an organized labor unions that fight for fair treatment, fair pay, job protection, etc., without fear of losing our lives. And I can admit that until the moment of seeing that slide of that beaten man, I never considered my union membership a big deal. I wasn’t looking for a union job when I was hired into AT&T. It just happens to be they way I got my foot in the door. Now that I’m here, I can’t even say that I’ll always be on this side of the line with my employment with the company. But I can say that while I’m on this side, I appreciate the work the union does on my behalf. Because of what they’ve done over the years, I’ve been well able to provide for myself and my children. So, today, as the company is attempting to make it difficult for me to comfortably maintain my standard of living, I will continue to stand with them and support their efforts.
If they ask me to wear red every Thursday to display my solidarity, I will. If they ask me to spend my lunch hour at an informational picket to openly display to AT&T that I can make a sacrifice for what’s important to me, I will. If they ask me to come out on a Sunday afternoon for a rally, I will. If they ask me to walk off the job, I will.
And when the negotiations are over, if the union has to make more concessions than we all wanted, I won’t declare that the small sacrifices I made were a waste of time because they don't compare to the sacrifices of those who came before me. Instead, I’ll feel proud that I took a stand for something. Like it's often said, “Stand for something or you’ll fall for anything.”
One would think, in this case, that the members with the vested interest in these issues would do whatever their union leaders asked of them. Well, they don’t. From what I’ve been witnessing, too many of the members want to reap the benefits that the union provides, but aren’t the least bit interested in making even small sacrifices for the cause. Instead, they sit around sprouting off about how the union does nothing for them. About how the union is so weak. About how the union is busy lining their own pockets, not really fighting for the benefits those they represent.
The union, however, is only as strong as its members. I concede that labor unions are nowhere near the powerhouses they were back in the old days. But now I see why. It’s the weakness of the membership. The people don’t possess the passion for workers’ rights like they did back in the day. The people have taken for granted all of the benefits (40hr workweek, vacation days, personal days, sick days, 15 minute breaks, etc) that labor unions brought to the American workplace. Just like civil rights, the people have forgotten that the people of yesteryear fought and died for those very rights.
During a union steward training class I attended a couple of weeks, I was humbled beyond measure at the sight of a man beaten to death for supporting organized labor. Today, I, along with thousands of others, are able to be apart of an organized labor unions that fight for fair treatment, fair pay, job protection, etc., without fear of losing our lives. And I can admit that until the moment of seeing that slide of that beaten man, I never considered my union membership a big deal. I wasn’t looking for a union job when I was hired into AT&T. It just happens to be they way I got my foot in the door. Now that I’m here, I can’t even say that I’ll always be on this side of the line with my employment with the company. But I can say that while I’m on this side, I appreciate the work the union does on my behalf. Because of what they’ve done over the years, I’ve been well able to provide for myself and my children. So, today, as the company is attempting to make it difficult for me to comfortably maintain my standard of living, I will continue to stand with them and support their efforts.
If they ask me to wear red every Thursday to display my solidarity, I will. If they ask me to spend my lunch hour at an informational picket to openly display to AT&T that I can make a sacrifice for what’s important to me, I will. If they ask me to come out on a Sunday afternoon for a rally, I will. If they ask me to walk off the job, I will.
And when the negotiations are over, if the union has to make more concessions than we all wanted, I won’t declare that the small sacrifices I made were a waste of time because they don't compare to the sacrifices of those who came before me. Instead, I’ll feel proud that I took a stand for something. Like it's often said, “Stand for something or you’ll fall for anything.”
Monday, April 6, 2009
Happy Belated Loc Anniversary!
Ohmigod! I've completely broken hair loc protocol. The month of March has come and gone and I didn't even bother acknowledging my 1yr hair loc anniversary. Since I don't remember the exact date, I've designated March 25th as my official anniversary date. I know this because I was hosting my sister's bridal shower at that time and gave my hair a fresh two-strand twist 'do.
What's so important about that, you may be wondering? On the various natural hair websites I've visited over the past two years, women and a small number of men, expressed nothing but joy and exhilaration about the anniversary of the date they went natural (the big Chop, as some call it). All the way from the 1st, through the 10th, and even through the 50th and higher. Yes, it's just that significant. The date a person makes a conscience decision to go against the grain of everything they've been conditioned to believe about what's beautiful, what's sexy, what's acceptable is a BIG deal.
I'm ecstatic to be apart of that community! While the journey was long and tumultuous--some of the absurd comments from family, friends, coworkers were just unbelievable--it was so worth it. To be able to wake up every morning without having to allot at least 30 minutes to my morning regimen with trying to flatten, curl, or slick my hair into a style, which was never to my liking 100%, brings about a joy that is indescribable. To listen to those who once ridiculed me now singing praises of how pretty my hair is, how long my hair has grown brings a smile across my lips. When people pull me to the side, almost whispering, that they, too, are interested in locks, but were afraid of the process, I feel proud to sharing my story.
Although rewarding in the end, the beginning of the lock process is not easy. Physically and emotionally. First, the hair goes through a state of confusion. After years of keeping it from it's natural state via chemical or heat processing, now you want it to do what it was doing way back before you started all of that. Next, the pool of your peers may think you've lost your mind and some will even tell you so, like one of my coworkers told me. "Girl, I thought you were having some kind of mental breakdown." By far, that was the wildest comment I heard regarding my transformation. But there were definitely others. Those who had manners enough not to speak such idiocies to my face kindly waited until I was out of earshot to comment amongst their friends. Some just looked on. Then, there are the silly people who will pass their judgment in the form of jokes like, "be quiet before I send you to the beauty salon" or other forms of subtle teasing.
But the most common form of negativity I encountered was with people who can't wait to tell you that you'll have to cut all your hair off if you decide you don't want the locks anymore. That used to bother me until I became more confident with the decision I made. Then I began countering with some facts of my own: It's only hair. Hair doesn't define me, it's an extension of me. And most importantly, I've spent so much of my life enslaved to my hair that it will be several years down the line before that will even be a remote consideration. I mean, why would I remove myself so quickly from the freedom I've just begun to enjoy. The way I see it, at 33 years old, I've been fighting to make my hair something that it's not for 20 plus years. Now it's time to spend the next 20 or so letting it do what it do.
And I'm loving it! So Happy 1yr Lock Anniversary to me!
What's so important about that, you may be wondering? On the various natural hair websites I've visited over the past two years, women and a small number of men, expressed nothing but joy and exhilaration about the anniversary of the date they went natural (the big Chop, as some call it). All the way from the 1st, through the 10th, and even through the 50th and higher. Yes, it's just that significant. The date a person makes a conscience decision to go against the grain of everything they've been conditioned to believe about what's beautiful, what's sexy, what's acceptable is a BIG deal.
I'm ecstatic to be apart of that community! While the journey was long and tumultuous--some of the absurd comments from family, friends, coworkers were just unbelievable--it was so worth it. To be able to wake up every morning without having to allot at least 30 minutes to my morning regimen with trying to flatten, curl, or slick my hair into a style, which was never to my liking 100%, brings about a joy that is indescribable. To listen to those who once ridiculed me now singing praises of how pretty my hair is, how long my hair has grown brings a smile across my lips. When people pull me to the side, almost whispering, that they, too, are interested in locks, but were afraid of the process, I feel proud to sharing my story.
Although rewarding in the end, the beginning of the lock process is not easy. Physically and emotionally. First, the hair goes through a state of confusion. After years of keeping it from it's natural state via chemical or heat processing, now you want it to do what it was doing way back before you started all of that. Next, the pool of your peers may think you've lost your mind and some will even tell you so, like one of my coworkers told me. "Girl, I thought you were having some kind of mental breakdown." By far, that was the wildest comment I heard regarding my transformation. But there were definitely others. Those who had manners enough not to speak such idiocies to my face kindly waited until I was out of earshot to comment amongst their friends. Some just looked on. Then, there are the silly people who will pass their judgment in the form of jokes like, "be quiet before I send you to the beauty salon" or other forms of subtle teasing.
But the most common form of negativity I encountered was with people who can't wait to tell you that you'll have to cut all your hair off if you decide you don't want the locks anymore. That used to bother me until I became more confident with the decision I made. Then I began countering with some facts of my own: It's only hair. Hair doesn't define me, it's an extension of me. And most importantly, I've spent so much of my life enslaved to my hair that it will be several years down the line before that will even be a remote consideration. I mean, why would I remove myself so quickly from the freedom I've just begun to enjoy. The way I see it, at 33 years old, I've been fighting to make my hair something that it's not for 20 plus years. Now it's time to spend the next 20 or so letting it do what it do.
And I'm loving it! So Happy 1yr Lock Anniversary to me!
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